[WARNING: If personal notes get you bored, don’t read this.]
I was 11 years old boy when EPRDF took power. As a kid, I had a
confused feeling during the time the then 'Woyane' controlled Addis on Ginbot
20. During the nights before, we used to listen to 'Dimtsi Woyane’, radio
broadcasted by TPLF from battlefield. I remember the elderlies were very
worried however I kind of loved the guys from what they, the Woyanes, spoke on
the radio. In addition, my father, despite being a member of the then national
guard in the Ethio-Somalia border, had said he doesn't care if Derg is defeated,
or at least my sister had told me he had said so. As a child, I was looking at the opportunity of being reunited with my father when that happens.
Even though the 'Woyanes' were portrayed like monsters by the time they
took control of Addis Ababa, I liked them. I stared at them wondering at their
never-cut hair, old shorts, and sandals. I told a couple of them that I love
them when they come to our village for disarmament and search for illegal
holds of arms.
Soon later, they are worn with good uniforms and 'kesikis' shoes which
I had wished to have a pair. Their name became popularly EPRDF and the 'Woyane'
turned a derogatory term for 'Derg' propagandists already associated it with
equivalence to 'separatists'.
EPRDF took control of state-owned and widely listened radio
station monopoly and preached a lot about democracy, national liberation, equal rights, and so on. It was my formative age. Everything I listened to was sweet and
persuasive. On the contrary, the elderly in our neighborhood became so critical
of the new regime. I didn't know why but I thought it was only because it is a
government that EPRDF is hated and that only because newly formed opposition
political parties are not given the governing chance, that they are preferred.
I didn't know why people became more concerned about their ethnic
background. Discussions of the older people seemed always as if there is
something to be worried about. I couldn't get the slightest idea of what bothered
them until I turned 18 and went with my father to 'Kebele' to get an ID. I was
asked what my 'nationality' (not citizenship but ethnicity) was. I never felt like belonging to
any ethnic group before. I turned my face toward my father who took almost a
minute to respond to. He looked like he lost an internal battle immediately
after that. My mother and father are from different regions (at least by birth) and it never
mattered before. Until now, telling the 'nationality/ethnicity written on my ID is
embarrassing to me. I always felt it isn't representative of my identity. It is
like I’m legally forced to feel belonged to one group and not to the rest.